I decided, after some consideration, to share my sexual shame story for the first time (publicly). Last night after I emailed her with my post, I realized that it was Sexual Assault Awareness month. A powerful time to unite, support, & share our stories. You can find mine here.
So here we are. Jennifer has joined me in being vulnerable, & opened her heart with us. I encourage you to check out her blog. I would also like to note how beautiful it is that it doesn't matter where you come from, what's your religion, how you perceive things, as long as we listen & respect each other, & hopefully with light & love! We each struggle with similar things, & must find our own unique path through them.
May this speak to you....
Hi! My name is Jennifer Rochester. When Katherine asked me to do a blog post for her blog I wasn’t too sure what I was going to write about, but I decided to share my testimony with you and how I came to my convictions on dating and purity. For starters, I was raised in a Christian home, homeschooled, and as far as I’m concerned the most perfect home possible. I now realize how much I had to be thankful for. I was what I guess the world would call “Sheltered” With that said, I was a Christian… I accepted Christ at the age of 5. Although, for the most part my faith was what I now refer to as my parents faith. I read my Bible, memorized verses, prayed, etc just because I knew it was what I was supposed to do. Then I hit my teen years. Nothing really changed except I went on a few mission trips and it really opened my eyes to what the world was like and how not everyone had been raised like me. After this I began seeking God for myself and it has never been the same since! The next part may come as a shock to you that I will be this open and honest, but the truth is more people deal with this than we care to acknowledge. I had my innocence taken away from me. Yes, you read that right… I had every bit of innocence ripped from me. So what was I to do now? Through the tears I remember just seeking the face of God… I didn’t understand and I had no idea what sex, dating, or love was about. It all seemed so muddled in my mind. This may seem to have nothing to do with my testimony, but it has everything to do with it. I remember reading book after book, crying out to God, digging into His word, writing love letters to my future husband, crying more, talking to people that I trusted because it all didn’t make sense. I knew this wasn’t God’s idea of love and sexuality. As I continued searching for answers I began to realize that God wanted to call me to a higher standard. Some of these standards have not been easy, but they are possible. Just so you know… I will not kiss a guy until my wedding day. There are obviously other things I will not do as well, but this is the main one that God really pointed out to me. Now do I think kissing is wrong? No. I do not think it is sin, although I do believe that it leads to other things. That is why I choose to abstain until my wedding day. You may ask whether I believe in dating or not. I do believe dating is perfectly fine. I am in a relationship right now. With that said though, dating is not a game to me. Love isn’t something that can happen over and over. I believe God has the one specific person for you and although they may not be the only person you ever date they should not be one of many. The purpose of dating in my life is to find my future husband. That means I do not date guys who are not Christians, who do not have the same goals in life as me, or even more so a guy that I wouldn’t want to have a son exactly like. Although I do date I take it very seriously. Has this always been easy? No…. trust me… I will be brutally honest with you. There are many times that I want to kiss my boyfriend and many times when I was single and had opportunities to date guys, but I knew they were not the right ones it was hard. I sometimes ask God why He led me to these convictions, but I know that He has a plan and a reason! If you are a guy or girl reading this I challenge you….DO NOT settle! Yes, it is hard and yes it is a battle, but I have full confidence that when you find that right guy or girl it will be worth it! God promises to bless the faithful. Are you being faithful? I read something the other day and this guy was noting how God has already assigned you the right person so when you date someone before them and give them parts of you that belong to your future spouse you are in a sense cheating on your future spouse. Ouch. Are you cheating on your future spouse? It is worth a thought… Have you been hurt, molested, raped, or violated in anyway? I understand the confusion and pain. It is real. My prayer for you is that you seek the face of God and see what HIS plan is for you. That is the only way you can get true peace. If you have any questions or would like to talk to me more about this feel free to email me jennifer.rochester{at}charter.net or read some more on my blog at Love Unawakened.I encourage you to share your story of purity, to read the post I shared with Jennifer, & to share your support! :) I hope you've enjoyed this Integration Session- there's more to come!
In Christ,
Jennifer
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